Tag Archives: how-to

How To Build An Underground Bunker

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Build your very own underground bunker!

Your Town, USA – In our on-going effort to bring you free adult education classes, the FM Observer is proud to present our next, in a series of lessons for modern day survival.

This article focuses on “How To Build Your Own Underground Bunker”.

Like us, if you have ever desired to live in a unique home, and also wanted to have the CIA-type security of an underground bunker, this lesson is just for you.

Underground bunkers come in all shapes and sizes and can range from small storage bunkers to entire living facilities equipped with beds, food, and beer.

Whatever your paranoia, an underground bunker is sure to solve your problems, and give you and your family the peace-of-mind you seek.

Here are a few simple steps to build your very own underground bunker:

1. Design your underground bunker. Plan your work before you work your plan.

2. Build it yourself or hire a qualified contractor. Make sure you find someone who can keep a secret.

3. Ensure that your underground bunker is safe and well lit. Check for improper ventilation and avoid a roof collapse.

4. Stock your underground bunker with everything that you and your loved ones will need. Take a trip to Sam’s Club and buy at least $250 of supplies, including water, non-perishable foods, and Advil.

5. Enjoy your underground bunker for the rest of your natural life!

Please feel free to send in photos of your underground bunker to the FM Observer. We’ll show you ours, if you show us yours.

nascar fan

How To Become A NASCAR Fan In 3 Days.

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nascar fan

Below I am going to give you some tips on how to become a NASCAR fan in only three days.  If you follow them to a T you are well on your way to becoming one the greatest NASCAR fans of all-time.

 

1. Go here.  Put your mouse over the scroller to the right and hold your mouse button down so you can scroll up and down.  Close your eyes.  Scroll up and down more than five times and then point and hold your finger on the screen.  Open your eyes.  Bingo!  You just picked your driver to root for.

2.  Buy all his memorabilia.  Little model cars, stickers, hats, t-shirts.  Try and wear them everyday.  Put a bunch of stickers of the driver all over your car.  Your goal here is to convince everyone that you are a hardcore fan and have been for quite sometime.

3. Visit Walmart and get some overalls and some flannel shirts.  Wear them as much as possible.

4. Spend your entire paycheck on a nascar ticket as well as a plane ticket.

5.  Switch your choice of beer to Miller Lite or any domestic beer for the matter.  Or, if your driver is sponsored by a beer company, you better damn well drink that beer and that beer only.

6.  Set all radio stations to country music.

7.  Sell your soul.

There you go.  You should be able to follow the easy tips above to become a true NASCAR fan in only three days.