Instagram Sucks and So Do You

March 14th, 2012 | by Bill Burns

Instagram Sucks and So Do YouWhat is Instagram you ask?  It is an Apple and Android application where over 15 million sheep users like to masturbate with each other over vintage pictures they take.  Instagram gives these hipsters users access to many different types of photo filters so any idiot can now look artsy.  What many of these filters actually do is degrade the picture to look like it’s from the 1950’s, 1960’s, or 1970’s.  You get the picture.  Essentially what these morons people are doing is continually slapping the shit out of and continually taking big large dirty dumps on the hundreds of engineers that dedicated their lives to improving this technology.

 

We have gone from this..

 

to this..

.

 

A god damn cellular phone that takes pictures!  A phone that takes professional quality pictures!

 

Instagram Hippster Trash Fuck YouNow check out this picture to the left.  Can you guess what camera this was taken from?   You guessed the old one?  NOPE!  It was taken from the small PHONE that takes PICTURES in the YEAR 2012!!  It’s amazing……..ly stupid of you to take a magnificent piece of technology, take a good quality picture with it, and then essentially destroy it and make it look like shit for the sake of being a shitty hipster.  You fail at life and you fail at taking pictures.

So just stop it.  How about you just use your phone for calling people and disable your camera.  You are not artsy.  You are not deep.  You look like someone with severe brain damage confused about what sock to put on which foot.  If you like old pictures so much how about you actually become useful and build a TIME MACHINE.  Then you can go back in time and use those shitty cameras to take your shitty pictures with.


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Bill grew up in one of the largest cities in the United States, Maza, North Dakota. Being a cow milker by trade, it was only after stroking thousands upon thousands of cow nipples was he able to save up enough money and move to Fargo, ND. It was here that he joined FM Observer. In his free time he enjoys carving rocking horses out of wood, healing the sick, and running marathons across oceans.