Tag Archives: rural

Lucky Local Mormon Groom Successfully Marries Identical Twin Sister Brides

Plurality is reality.

East Fargo, ND – April means floods and also the official beginning of wedding season!

One of the first weddings of the year turned out to be a real doozy: In true Mormon fashion, Lorenzo Snow entered into eternal matrimony with Josetta and Yosetta Pettibone, who are identical twin sisters from Pettibone, ND.

In true Mormon fashion, the multi-marriage was solemnized and sealed by temple covenant. During the bonding ordinance, wedding music was provided by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Polygamy (or polygyny) is arguably legal if practiced under the umbrella of religious freedom of expression. A Mormon plural marriage is kosher as long as it is directly authorized by revelation from God through the living prophet.

Lorenzo Snow and his wives will live as Pettibone ruralists while being marriage pluralists and studying to be massage therapists.

What you’re probably thinking is that plurality in its totality has a personality of normality as long as a formality gives it the legality of morality in the commonality of a technicality.

After being bonded by temple covenant, wedding reception dance music was provided by the Seer Stones.

Rural Fargo Man Cornered By Moose For ‘A Really Really Long Time’

…and so you’re telling me this is the reason why you were late for work today?!

Fargo, ND – A rural Fargo man was simply trying to bring the garbage out prior to heading off to work on a foggy Monday morning when he suddenly heard a very large noise.

In the early morning light, Bruno Maneek says he then saw something moving toward him from the dense brushy forest next to their lot.

It was the world’s largest moose who was trotting straight at him so Bruno instinctively began backing up towards the breezeway that connected the garage to their home.

Unfortunately, Bruno’s wife was out of town at the National Botox Conference so he was home alone at the time.

For the next two hours, this massively giant moose had Bruno Maneek cornered only feet away from where he had a loaded shotgun hanging in their breezeway.

Then, after a long and fruitless stand-off, the enormoose moose just disappeared.

“Did it quickly trot off into the forest?”, asked Bruno’s doubting boss who was wondering why his most unreliable worker was late again.

“No, it just vanished like a bubble that got popped by a pointy pin”, replied Bruno Maneek, mere moments before he got fired from his job.