Tag Archives: scheels

Christopher Wiener Fargo

Man Busted In Sex Toy Case Forgot Some Supplies

Christopher Wiener FargoFargo, ND – A Fargo man recently busted for stealing a fake vagina, has been busted again.

Christopher Wiener, 26, is back in the news this time trying to steal a camera from Scheels on 45th ST Fargo.

Last week, Christopher Weiner was caught stealing a fake vagina.  After he was let go, Mr. Weiner had time to go home and think.  It was during this thinking session, Mr Weiner realized he was missing an important electronic accessory to compliment his fake vagina.  That is, a camera that takes video.

Weiner then made his way to Scheels-All-Sports on 45th ST.  However, Weiner isn’t good at shoplifting and was subsequently caught again.  This time, trying to steal a camera with video.

Everything is coming together.  We all now know what fate that fake vagina had that night.  Mr. Wiener was planing on having quite the party apparently with that fake vagina and camera and we feel sorry for any future fake vaginas and cameras that are in  Mr. Wieners possession in the future.

Scheels All Sports Fargo

Scheels All Sports To Turn Into Amusement Park. Will Sell Sporting Goods On The Side.

Scheels All Sports FargoFargo, ND – Scheels All Sports, the Behemoth of the Midwest, will transform it’s enormous and very popular sports store in Fargo into an amusement park the FM Observer has learned.  Scheels is known for its wide variety of sporting goods stores around the Midwest as well as its ever so popular ferris wheel located in the Fargo store.  With the economy still down and people finally realizing they can buy the same low quality shit cheaper online, Scheels has been struggling to keep the doors open.  What hasn’t been suffering is the ferris wheel as seen immediately upon walking into the Fargo store.  In fact, it’s the only thing keeping this store from going under.

Ferris wheel ride sales have soared and beat actual sporting goods sales 100 to 1.  Because of this, Scheels has decided to transform this mansion of an overpriced sporting goods store into a small amusement park.  Among the plans of installing a larger ferris wheel, water ride, and enormous gravity wheel, there will still be sporting goods available to purchase randomly throughout the amusement park.  Sporting goods such as deer piss, camouflage clothing, and night vision goggles.  Apparently this is hunting gear and not some perverted equipment deer fuckers would use to throw a ‘WILD’ party.

This is tough for the economy and tough for Fargo.  Although people will no longer be raped by buying overpriced items, at least bobby the crooked back alien baby with a hideous face, will be able to ride his ferris wheel on Sundays and pick up some deer piss on the way out the door.