Pórtráit óf Ivóry Mittán by Amsterdam Douglass to be auctioned off to help save Fargo.
Fargo, ND – Fargo’s very own Amsterdam Douglass is donating his most famous recent painting for auction to help raise funds for Fargo’s focused fight for freedom from feared forecasted floods.
The painting, which is cleverly entitled Pórtráit óf Ivóry Mittán is valued at $1.8 million because: 1. It is by Amsterdam Douglass, and 2. It is the last known portrait painted of the famous Ivóry Mittán before getting violently struck and killed by a distracted driver who was texting “LOL” to a lame Michael Jackson joke.
Besides helping fill millions of sandbags, you can assist Fargo’s flood fight by donating money to the cause via purchasing a flood fight T-shirt which displays the acronym: F.L.O.O.D.= Fargo Loves Our Own Diversion.
The future is here: framed oil paintings that actually move on the canvas!?
Fargo, ND – Local artist Amsterdam Douglass has apparently achieved the unachievable!
This semi-famous Fargo artist, previously mostly known for his altruistic generosities, has now somehow painted an oil painting that shows actual movement on the canvas upon which it was painted and within the frame in which it is physically bordered.
When asked how he did it, Amsterdam Douglass slowly smiled, while only saying: “Kinetic Oil Paints!”
When asked what the hell are kinetic oil paints, Amsterdam Douglass slowly smiled, as he gracefully reached for his legume-flavored vape pen.
When asked about his legume-flavored vaporizer, Amsterdam Douglass slowly blew a large, thick, legume-flavored vape cloud, into which he virtually vanished via vicarious vaporization.
Some don’t see much of a resemblance to Michelle Obama whilst others say: Who cares?!
Painter, Virginia – After the official unveiling of Michelle Obama’s portrait for the Smithsonian Institution, debate immediately began on its likeness to the painting’s subject.
Our painting expert, Amsterdam Douglass, believes a portrait painter has a wide latitude in which to express their creative interpretation of a person or object.
“I personally love the Michelle Obama portrait, painted by Amy Sherald, who certainly has her own style, as do we all. If they wanted an exact likeness of First Lady Michelle Obama, then they should have used a photograph.”
Many others have a much differing opinion which generally goes like this: the painting is great, but should probably look very similar to the person who’s being painted.
One critic of the portrait suggested that just the face in the painting be corrected to look more like the First Lady before it is permanently institutionalized at the Smithsonian.
This stunningly beautiful mobile by Amsterdam Douglass has an estimated worth of $100,000
West Fargo, ND – As a special Valentine’s Day treat for our readers, the FM Observer’s local resident artist has offered up some extra exciting fun.
Amsterdam Douglass is his name, and mobiles are his latest game.
Our long-time friend and seriously famous artist, Amsterdam Douglass, has created ten Valentine’s Day mobiles (each worth an estimated $100,000) and has also cleverly hidden them throughout the greater Fargo-Moorhead area.
Let us know if you find one of these beautiful Valentine’s Day mobiles created especially for you by Amsterdam Douglass.
We would like to have a picture taken of all the winners holding their mobiles.
So, good luck mobile hunting on this lovely Spring day, and Happy Valentine’s Day from the FM Observer, your most trusted source of satirical fake news.
Local artist Amsterdam Douglass is donating his ‘Pink Daisy’ painting to help Hillary get elected from prison.
Fargo, ND – A new local Fargo art gallery (YOGART Gallery) is having a special art show (Help Hillary Now!) to help raise money for Hillary’s Clinton’s Legal Defense Fund.
Facing a possibly long stay in prison (15 years) for breaking multiple federal laws, Hillary (The Pillary) is going to need a lot of money to not only pay all the expected legal fees but also for needed protection in prison (by Secret Server Agents).
Fargo artist Amsterdam Douglass: “I am donating my ‘Pink Daisy’ painting (worth an estimated $100,000 on eBay) to help get the ball rolling toward being proactively raising funds to help what could be our first-ever female US president to be elected and serve as president, all from the comfortable confines of prison.“