The new Piano Playing Support Group is for everyone and anyone who likes to play the piano and eat cookies.
West Fargo, ND –A new support group for piano players is forming in West Fargo for people who might enjoy the benefits of such a group.
Dr. Abu Coplin will be hosting the Piano Player Support Group meetings at his new Pianomatic Support Center.
Each session will begin with a Meet & Greet, followed by participants taking turns playing piano, followed by treats and a discussion group called Issues & Tissues.
Participants will be invited to share their respective feelings on a Question of the Day, such as: What is your favorite note? Do you believe in chords? Why are some piano keys black whilst others are white? If you were a piano, would you play yourself?
If you’d be interested in joining the Piano Player Support Group, please contact Dr. Abu Coplin at his Pianomatic Support Center.
Ironically, all the letters in Abu Coplin can be re-arranged to spell: Piano Club!
Jupiter, Florida – In the wake of Tiger Woods getting arrested for driving under the influence (of something), many see this as his quiet way of asking for help.
Dr. Pedigo Elsworth explains that Tiger Woods may be the victim of over-wealthiness which can easily take its toll on an otherwise fairly normal person.
Dr. Dople Seigworth concurs, noting that having an abundance of money can leave a vacuous void in someone’s life which is usually filled with drugs, alcohol, facebook, or liberalism.
Life ain’t easy when you’re super rich. Just ask Tiger, whose hair is now going gray.
A Go-Fund-Me account is being set up to help Tiger Woods however none of the money raised will actually be given to Tiger as that would just make matters worse for him.
Tiger Woods: “Yeah, I really appreciate the help and support since that is what I need. The song lyrics ‘When you’re down and troubled, and you need a helping hand, and nothing, nothing is going right’ pretty much describes my life these days.”
Ironically, both Pedigo Elsworth and Dople Seigworth can be rearranged to spell: Help Tiger Woods!
“Many people have an uncontrollable craving for Eggnog.” –Pastor Gregg Donkin
Fargo, ND – A new support group is now forming in the Fargo-Moorhead area for people who are Eggnogaholics.
These are local folks living amongst us who cannot control their desire and lust for the holiday drink we call “Eggnog”.
If you are one of these locals who load up on and then uncontrollably glug the nog by your Christmas tree, then you know exactly of what we speaketh.
For those non-Eggnog cravers, addiction to the holiday nogdrink can be as strong and powerful as being addicted to nicotine, smartphone thumbing, and watching CNN.
Pastor Gregg Donkin is the leader of the new Eggnog Support Group: “Please come and join us if drinking Eggnog is your main weakness. We will be serving free Eggnog to anyone who would like to attend our meetings but who simply cannot go one hour without Eggnog while discussing it with others who share your nogmania.”
Ironically, all the letters in “Gregg Donkin” can be re-arranged to spell: Drink Eggnog!
Moorhead, MN – The good news is that the Fargo-Moorhead area does have a special support group just for people suffering from amnesia.
The bad news is that the group has never actually met because no one has ever shown up for a meeting.
The Amnesia Support Group’s leader is supposedly Dr. Opie Sugarman but he himself has also never shown up for a meeting.
Dr. Sugarman ponders: “We are very excited for our Amnesia Support Group to finally getogether and meet for coffee and general group support since amnesia can be so very problematical for our group members who suffer from various amnesial symptoms.”
If you would like to attend the FM Amnesia Support Group’s next meeting, simply look at any listing of the local support groups that meet in our area. Just to be safe, jot down on your calendar the date, time, and place of the next meeting and try not to forget to check your calendar on a daily basis to see what you might be missing. Cookies of any kind are also very welcome! :o]
Fargo, ND – Due to a widespread craving for human flesh causing concern that a zombie apocalypse is right around the corner, the Observer has decided to hold open workgroup sessions to help cannibals deal with their insatiable hunger for skin and organs.
We are happy to announce the FM Observer Cannibals Anonymous weekly group therapy sessions being held at the Hilton Garden Inn (MAP) on 19th Avenue in Fargo.
Meetings will occur every Tuesday and Thursday during the week at the following times:
3:00 pm to 4:00 pm (followed by cannibal Q&A)
5:30 pm to 6:30 pm (phalanges served as appetizer)
7:00 pm to 8:00 pm (eyeball casserole with sangria entrée available. $20/plate)
Entry fee for each one-hour session will be $500/head. Severed heads $50 extra. We are willing to waive your entry fee if you bring a sack of spring-harvest spleens.
FYI: We will not be feasting on each other.That is not what this is for. Please only come if you wish to curb your addiction to live flesh.
Please register in advance HERE. We’ll see you there!