For every person who finds an apartment, 199 others can not.

Williston, ND – With too many people looking for too little housing, folks in Williston, North Dakota are starting to reach their breaking point.

Because of the North Dakota oil boom, monthly rent in Williston is now the highest in the country.

Sadly, for every apartment, there are 200 people seeking a home where they can hang their hat.

Mayor Bob Cobb says: “It’s like trying to play ketchup but you never can quite catch up. It’s very frustrating as more and more people continue to roll into town.”

Professional psychologist René Magritte describes it this way: “The competition for housing is ferocious. For those that do get an apartment, not only is it extremely expensive, but you look out your window only to see all the people that wish they were you. It reminds me of the original Star Trek episode called The Mark Of Gideon in which a planet was so overcrowded that it was like Bombay on steroids.”

“There will absolutely be no strippers here.”

Williston, ND – Truck driver turned self made pimp party promoter Troy McKinley has come under fire recently.  Troy McKinley has been promoting and even selling tickets to his Party In The Patch (partyinthepatch.com).  The problem: there is no patch or land to even throw the party on.  One would think to sell tickets or throw a party you would first have some place to actually go party at.  Troy commented, “The hell you talking about land?  To throw a party you don’t need to actually have a place to go.”

Troy McKinley has been advertising in the Chicago and Twin Cities areas in the hopes of bringing classy, church going, upper-class women with very high moral aptitude to the Party In The Patch.  “I can’t see any reason why any lady would not want to spend $20 bucks to travel to North Dakota and hang out with greasy oil workers” Troy commented.  What a winning situation for any good gal to be apart of.  His two sponsors “Taco in a Bag” and “Escorts For U” couldn’t be reached for comment.