Recipes For Success

Bernie Sanders Waves Good-Bye To Humanity As He Leaves To Become The First President Of Mars

Mars, Milky Way – Shortly after suspending his 2020 presidential campaign, Bernie Sanders waved to everyone on Earth as he boarded his plane for Mars. “This is a bittersweet moment. Bitter because Joe Biden looks to...

Vacationing President Trump Blames Democrats For Hurting His Golf Game

Palm Beach, FL – While vacationing at his humble Mar-a-Lago retreat, President Trump has taken time from his executive duties to play some executive golf. Unfortunately, his golf game seems to be suffering from all the...

Hurricane Limbaugh Set To Wreak Havoc On Liberal Media

Palm Beach, FL – After Rush Limbaugh suggested that Hurricane Irma is merely a liberal hoax, Hurricane Limbaugh suddenly popped up in its place and is expected to stir things up on the mainland. Obviously caused by climate...

George Soros Admits To Being Emperor Palpatine

Naboo, Chommell Sector – After receiving a tip from one of our readers, we did some old-fashioned investigative reporting and discovered that George Soros is Emperor Palpatine. Both of these identities are also the same...

Delegate To Sue Party Convention Because Nobody Would Caucus With Her

Bismarck, ND – Dorothea Toppen went to the 2016 North Dakota Democrat Convention wanting to caucus but no one would caucus with her. So, Dorothea Toppen is planning on filing a lawsuit against the North Dakota Democrat...

Rachel Maddow Announces She’s Running For Governor Of North Dakota

Bismarck, ND – Rachel Maddow has stunned the political world by announcing that she is running for Governor of the great state of North Dakota. Most people know Rachel Maddow as a popular political commentator who hosts the...