July 27th, 2020 | by
Johnnny West Fargo, ND – A new festival coming to the Red River Valley should appeal to anyone who enjoys a more sedate lifestyle. Xanax Fest was the brain child of Nira Vam and her super laid-back boyfriend UpJohn. Mellow music...
July 10th, 2019 | by
Johnnny Moorhead, MN – Mr. Nevin Goodrum, who was peacefully sitting in his backyard, decided to call to the mourning dove that was sitting up in his tree by blowing into his cupped hands. After a few near-perfect calls, Mr....
February 22nd, 2019 | by
Johnnny Death Valley, CA – Did you know that smiling is almost a sure sign of depression? “Smiling Depression” is something you’ll want to start watching for amongst your family, friends, and co-workers. People...
January 26th, 2019 | by
Johnnny Downtown Fargo, ND – A 52nd liquor license has been granted for Downtown Fargo. Proprietor Elwood Wierschem is planning on opening The Peachflame which will specifically cater to bona fide weird-ohs. Mr. Wierschem in his...
February 16th, 2018 | by
Johnnny Fargo, ND – Many clinics have begun reporting cases of people suffering from the effects of The Fargo Syndrome. Doctors say it is comes from a fermenting combination of: the long cold winter, a lack of sun and warm fresh...
January 20th, 2017 | by
Johnnny West Fargo, ND – Security Test Labs is seeking more volunteers to help test out some new bullet proof jackets poised to soon hit the market. Volunteers will be compensated for their time and trouble but must first sign a...
June 5th, 2015 | by
Johnnny Downer, MN – In the quaint Minnesota village of Downer (formerly known as Xanax), a large-group wedding of nine women and five men is expected to challenge the definition of marriage. The recent marriage of fourteen (14)...
November 17th, 2013 | by
Johnnny Downer, MN – The sleepy town of Downer, Minnesota says it is time for a name change. All seven residents voted unanimously to change the name from Downer to Xanax. The mayor of Downer, speaking from his basement couch,...
