Many Lutheran church sanctuaries will soon be filling up with birds.
Dulutheran, MN – The Angelical Lutheran Church Of America (ALCOA) announced that it will become the denomination that opens its sanctuary doors up to any and all types of birds.
Ms. Rose Grosbeak is the spokeswoman for ALCOA: “Each church sanctuary will be opened up as a safe-haven bird sanctuary for migrating birds who perhaps need temporary or permanent shelter.”
Ms. Grosbeak explains that architecturally, most Lutheran church sanctuaries have a lot of interior height which will help provide the birds ample room to fly around in, while using the offering plates up on the main alters as feeding stations.
Various Lutheran member groups will be making bird nests along with cute little painted bird houses for the many different types of birds that are expected to take advantage of the new Lutheran bird sanctuary pronouncement.
Playing the F-chord is justifiable way of flipping the bird while maintaining plausible deniability.
Fargo, ND – Some surprised listeners in the crowd of a small Fargo bar got upset when the solo musician performing on stage repeatedly gave them the middle finger during her show.
To be fair, some hecklers had been yelling out that the music at the relatively small venue was too loud for the space and had been asking for the volume to be turned down.
After the musician tried explaining that what may have appeared to be “flipping the bird” was simply her trying to play the F-chord on the guitar, some of the bar patrons took that to be a stealth reference to getting the F-bomb.
How do you feel about this? Was the crowd being too sensitive? Do you like loud music in small bars? If the musician was flipping off the crowd, was it justified? Were you aware that the F-chord is now a secret new F-bomb?