Recipes For Success

FEMA Cot Ready For Hurricane Florence
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FEMA Cot Ready For Hurricane Florence

September 12th, 2018 | by Johnnny
Fort Bragg, NC – In anticipation of hurricane Florence’s arrival, the U.S. government is calmly assuring everyone that it could not be more prepared for what could be the worst storm to ever hit the East coast....
Center For Disease Control Bans The Handshake
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Center For Disease Control Bans The Handshake

May 6th, 2015 | by Johnnny
Shakespeare, Alabama – In the midst of mucho bad news during the last year about the spread of diseases, the customary handshake is in danger of extinction. Governmental scientists armed with the latest governmental...
Government To Begin Grouping People Into “Sick Camps” By What Diseases We Have
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Government To Begin Grouping People Into “Sick Camps” By What Diseases We Have

November 26th, 2014 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – With the help of the CDC (Centre for Disease Control), Big Government will soon be organizing communities into groups of people based on what diseases we have. Since Big Government already has access to all...
White House Ebola Response Team Practicing Their Craft
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White House Ebola Response Team Practicing Their Craft

October 16th, 2014 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – Luckily for the American people, the White House Ebola Response Team (WHERT) is constantly practicing to improve their game. Top key players of WHERT, including the newly named Ebola Czarina, Dr. Pam Demic,...
Government Program Ends After Goal Somehow Met
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Government Program Ends After Goal Somehow Met

March 21st, 2013 | by Nick
Washington, DC—To the shock and utter disbelief of many, a government program has officially called it quits. The initiative, said to help, prevent and raise awareness of its cause, has gone the way of extinction now that...
Lunatics Banned From Washington DC
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Lunatics Banned From Washington DC

January 13th, 2013 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – Back in December of 2012, Congress temporarily set aside its gridlock in an unusual bipartisan effort to ban the word ‘lunatic’ from all federal legislation. The new law was designed to remove...