News

Record Temps Spreading Fear Throughout Area
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Record Temps Spreading Fear Throughout Area

March 14th, 2012 | by Nick
As North Dakota temperatures reach record highs, many fear for their lives Fargo, ND – The month of March has proven already to be one of the scariest winter months on record for our region. With temperatures in the state...
“Piece of Crap” Recreational Vehicle Thrives in Western North Dakota Oil Boom
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“Piece of Crap” Recreational Vehicle Thrives in Western North Dakota Oil Boom

March 14th, 2012 | by Nick
A janky Western North Dakota RV revels in the demand for affordable housing Williston, ND – The milking of Western North Dakota’s oil reserves continues to flourish, bringing financial prosperity to the area. However,...
Former F-M Area City Planner Taking It In the Face Over Sexual Innuendo
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Former F-M Area City Planner Taking It In the Face Over Sexual Innuendo

March 14th, 2012 | by Nick
The names of cities and towns in this area have fallen under heavy scrutiny. Fargo, ND – As the population of our area continues to grow, more prominent figures have taken notice of the rampant perversion of its city...
Idiot Arrested After Attempted Drug Deal With Obvious Off-Duty Cop
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Idiot Arrested After Attempted Drug Deal With Obvious Off-Duty Cop

March 14th, 2012 | by Nick
Dumb ass immediately arrested after walk up drug sale attempt Fargo, ND – An Otsego, MN man was arrested last night after propositioning a cocaine deal to what was quite obviously an off-duty cop. The lieutenant wore street...
Josh Duhamel Lobbying to Purchase and Move City of Minot, ND
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Josh Duhamel Lobbying to Purchase and Move City of Minot, ND

March 14th, 2012 | by Nick
With much fame and fortune earned, Josh Duhamel reaches out to his home town. Minot, ND – Hometown kid-turned Hollywood celebrity Josh Duhamel is reaching out to his hometown in the best way he knows how. Mr. Duhamel has...
Alleged TouchTunes Terrorist Spreading Christmas Cheer Throughout the Land
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Alleged TouchTunes Terrorist Spreading Christmas Cheer Throughout the Land

March 14th, 2012 | by Bill Burns
Coming to a jukebox near you: Crappy Happy music. Fargo, ND – Modern technologies have afforded us many luxuries. In this day & age any knucklehead with a smartphone can hack into your favorite bar’s sound...
Local Elderly Lady Informed That She Was Dead.
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Local Elderly Lady Informed That She Was Dead.

March 14th, 2012 | by Bill Burns
Studying zombie survival wasn’t so stupid after all. Fargo, ND – Super Tuesday is supposed to be SUPER FUN.  Not for a local 84 year old elderly lady named Maureen.  She showed up to vote and was told she was...
ALERT! ICP Fan With White Paint Giving Underage Large Women Alcohol.
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ALERT! ICP Fan With White Paint Giving Underage Large Women Alcohol.

March 14th, 2012 | by Bill Burns
Fargo, ND – There is a JUGGALO alert out for a white ICP (Insane Clown Posse) fan hacking people with machetes.  He was last seen giving alcohol to an underage large woman.  He was wearing white paint, or ‘witch...
Mom Gets Daughter Unusual Birthday Gift.
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Mom Gets Daughter Unusual Birthday Gift.

March 14th, 2012 | by Bill Burns
5 year old gets plastic surgery. Fargo, ND —In a story you think didn’t come from this world, a Fargo mom dropped over 25k on her 5 year old daughter to get plastic surgery and breast enhancements.  The mom admits to...
Rick Santorum Takes Home Most Votes In North Dakota.
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Rick Santorum Takes Home Most Votes In North Dakota.

March 14th, 2012 | by Bill Burns
Toto, I’ve a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore. Fargo, ND –  Rick Santorum has taken home the most votes in North Dakota’s statewide Republican caucuses.  Or in Rick Santorum’s own words,...