Local

Area Man’s Unhealthy Obsession With Celebrity Revealed In Cryptic Letter
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Area Man’s Unhealthy Obsession With Celebrity Revealed In Cryptic Letter

December 19th, 2016 | by Nick
Fargo, ND – The ever-observant FMO staff acquired an intriguing bit of loot during a recent dog walk. “What is it, boy? What do you got there? No, leave it, it’s trash.” However, it was clear that this was...
Holiday Lights In Lindenwood To Be Visible From Space
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Holiday Lights In Lindenwood To Be Visible From Space

November 30th, 2016 | by Nick
Fargo, ND – The Fargo-Moorhead Sertoma Club is again providing a dazzling display of diodes and doodads. Holiday Lights In Lindenwood Park is open to the public and boy, is it impressive. So impressive, in fact, that if...
Area Clowns Needed To Scare Off Pipeline Protesters
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Area Clowns Needed To Scare Off Pipeline Protesters

October 27th, 2016 | by Nick
“Clean them clowns off our city streets ‘n get em out to the pipeline” Fargo, ND – Authorities think they’ve found a solution for all the unwelcome clowns we’ve noticed lately. Clowning around...
Tilda Swinton Adds Fargo Shapeshifting Charity Tour Stop
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Tilda Swinton Adds Fargo Shapeshifting Charity Tour Stop

October 25th, 2016 | by Nick
Fargo: The Witching Hour is nigh upon you. Famed Hollywood actress Tilda Swinton, best known for her superior acting prowess, is spearheading Breast Cancer Awareness month by bringing one of her lesser-known talents on a...
Pokemon Go Trainer Wants Your Ass In His Class
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Pokemon Go Trainer Wants Your Ass In His Class

August 12th, 2016 | by Nick
Fargo, ND – There is high local demand for Pokegoods and Pokeservices now that the hot new app Pokemon Go has taken America by storm. People of all ages are looking to level-up as they embark on a quest to “catch them...
Zombie Jimmy Hoffa Emerges From South Fargo Sinkhole
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Zombie Jimmy Hoffa Emerges From South Fargo Sinkhole

July 5th, 2016 | by Nick
Fargo, ND – After many years of wondering, pontificating and scouring its whereabouts, the location of Jimmy Hoffa’s body has finally revealed itself. Shortly after a gaping sinkhole opened up on 9th avenue and 42nd...
FM Observer Recruits Pizzaologist To Analyze Alleged New Pizza Corner Flavor
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FM Observer Recruits Pizzaologist To Analyze Alleged New Pizza Corner Flavor

June 30th, 2016 | by Nick
Fargo, ND – As you are surely aware, Valley City’s own Pizza Corner pizza has been bought out by a Minnesota company named Bernatello’s. Much hubbub has been tossed about over the “new...
FM Observer To Sponsor Park Wood Cemetery Renovation
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FM Observer To Sponsor Park Wood Cemetery Renovation

June 22nd, 2016 | by Nick
Fargo, ND – The north wing of Park Wood Cemetery in Fargo has been in dire need of a facelift for quite some time. Tombs are moldy, crypts are dungy and the rats have colonized a functioning village. This has led the...
West Fargo Lagoon Workers Tired Of Taking Crap From Everyone
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West Fargo Lagoon Workers Tired Of Taking Crap From Everyone

June 9th, 2016 | by Nick
West Fargo, ND – Waste Stabilization Pond Foreman Chlaff Peenisackle has seen it all come through. Severed limbs, sea monkey colonies, the physical manifestation of shame from the night before. These are only a few of what...
City of Fargo Approves Sidewalk Lemonade Stand Tax Break
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City of Fargo Approves Sidewalk Lemonade Stand Tax Break

May 24th, 2016 | by Jake
Block 9 appropriations wasn’t the only thing on the Fargo City Commission’s agenda last night. Not only did they approve 15.5 million dollars to help fund Doug Burgum’s skyscraper, but with a 5-0 vote they appropriated an...