National

Obama To Send All Republicans Into Outer Space
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Obama To Send All Republicans Into Outer Space

December 21st, 2014 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – With his growing unconstitutional powers, President Obama is planning on executing another of his executive memos. This time he is plotting to ask all top Republican leaders to take a “tour” of...
Government To Begin Grouping People Into “Sick Camps” By What Diseases We Have
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Government To Begin Grouping People Into “Sick Camps” By What Diseases We Have

November 26th, 2014 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – With the help of the CDC (Centre for Disease Control), Big Government will soon be organizing communities into groups of people based on what diseases we have. Since Big Government already has access to all...
NASA Reducing Its Goal To Just Being Able To Successfully Launch A Rocket
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NASA Reducing Its Goal To Just Being Able To Successfully Launch A Rocket

October 29th, 2014 | by Johnnny
Wallops Island, VA – Despite an apparent ‘glitch’ during take-off, NASA is saying that everything is under control and that no one should have any reason for concern. Even though many on-lookers witnessed an...
Clever ‘Calibration Errors’ Ensure Democrat Victories In Every Political Race
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Clever ‘Calibration Errors’ Ensure Democrat Victories In Every Political Race

October 25th, 2014 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – Even if no Democrats show up to vote in the upcoming state and national elections, Republicans better be ready to lose each and every political race in the country. Democrat community organizers have...
Lumberjack Union Working With CDC To Stop Treebola
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Lumberjack Union Working With CDC To Stop Treebola

October 19th, 2014 | by Johnnny
Treetop, North Carolina – Lumberjacks all across the country are wasting no time in their frantic effort to chop down any and all trees suspected of having the dangerous Treebola Virus. According to the Center for Disease...
White House Ebola Response Team Practicing Their Craft
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White House Ebola Response Team Practicing Their Craft

October 16th, 2014 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – Luckily for the American people, the White House Ebola Response Team (WHERT) is constantly practicing to improve their game. Top key players of WHERT, including the newly named Ebola Czarina, Dr. Pam Demic,...
FDA Approves Ebola Vaccine Drink: Coca-Bola
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FDA Approves Ebola Vaccine Drink: Coca-Bola

October 13th, 2014 | by Kitz
Washington, D.C. – Amidst a rising tide of panic over the deadly ebola virus threat, the FDA has fast-tracked an experimental vaccine drink for mass public consumption. Coca-Bola, which promises instant immunity against the...
Weeping Christ Statue Feared To Have Ebola Virus
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Weeping Christ Statue Feared To Have Ebola Virus

October 8th, 2014 | by Nick
Milaria, Italy—As the ebola pandemic continues to build steam, countries across the globe are showing concern. The Observer has learned that a recent discovery of a weeping-blood statue of Jesus is feared to contain the deadly...
New Green Shoes Designed To Lessen Carbon Footprints
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New Green Shoes Designed To Lessen Carbon Footprints

October 4th, 2014 | by Johnnny
Greenspring, PA – The Federal Government, secretly working in conjunction with Algore, has designed a new Green Shoe to help lessen each person’s carbon footprints. Here are some important facts you need to know about...
Civilian Trumpet Militia Groups Now Forming In Your Area
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Civilian Trumpet Militia Groups Now Forming In Your Area

September 23rd, 2014 | by Johnnny
Anytown, USA – An exciting new grass-roots organization is now starting new chapters in your area. The Civilian Trumpet Militia is being formed in all 57 states of the USA. If you have ever played a trumpet which might be...