Tag Archives: willy nilly

Directions To Our FMO Corporate Headquarters For Reader Meet-N-Greet Parties

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Our FMO Corporate Office Park can be reached from almost anywhere!

West Fargo, ND – In appreciation of our beloved and faithful readers, your FM Observer will be hosting a sensational series of Reader Meet-N-Greets during each of the upcoming weekends.

Expensively fine free food will continually be served by our very own French Chef Jean-Claude Sorbonne including Loony Lobster Bisque, Polar Bear Patty Burgers, Midwest Carp Casserole, Red Rum Spicy Pie, and old-fashioned Butterscotch Pudding.

Fabulous door prizes will include: A vintage Vespa scooter, valuable paintings by Amsterdam Douglass, Get-out-of-Jail cards, one-way trips To Grand Forks, unopened cans of Spam, breeding pairs of Sugar Gliders, autographed and framed pictures of Dr. Willy Nilly, and lots more!

Live Music will be provided by The Double Negatives.

Amazingly accurate fortune tellings will be performed by Precog!

How to get to FMO Headquarters from almost anywhere: Turn right at the next light, drive 4.2 miles until you see a small house on a corner, turn left, and then simply follow our welcome signs. Enjoy! And thanks for reading the FM Observer ☺

Long Cold Winter Starting To Take Its Effect On Normal People

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At the beginning of winter, this person was just a normal looking guy.

Fargo, ND – Are you starting to feel the negative effects of winter? Do normally easy small tasks seem bigly challenging?

Maybe you’re suffering from WHAKOH like most other people living in Fargo. WHAKOH stands for: Winter Hits All Kind Of Hard.

If the idea of going to the grocery store to get a few basic items feels like you’re preparing to cross Antarctica by sled, you have a case of WHAKOH.

If having to do any snow blowing or shoveling feels tantamount to getting a root canal, you are going WHAKOH.

Our very own Dr. Willy Nilly suggests joining a square dancing group or take regular trips to any of the local liquor stores.

Also, marking the days (or even the hours) off on a large calendar sometimes helps to visually remind you that winter will some day be over.

New Test For Dementia Is Highly Conclusive

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If you see any movement in this image, you probably have some stage of dementia.

Crazy Horse, SD – There is now a new and very simple test for determining pre-dementia as well as full-blown dementia.

This test which was scientifically developed by the Dementia Interrogative Program (DIP) is highly conclusive for indicating if someone such as yourself may be leaning toward dementia.

How it works: When looking directly at this black and white image, if you are seeing any movement within the inner circle, this indicates pre-dementia.

If you see movement throughout the entire image, you most likely are already suffering from full-blown (and previously undiagnosed) dementia.

After taking this simple test, if you would like to privately discuss the results of your test with a trained professional, please call any phone number and ask to speak directly with Dr. Willy Nilly (and mention promo code “FMO” for a free My Pillow!).

Use Decorative Duct Tape To Help Your Partner Stop Snoring During The Holidays

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To stop snoring, duct tape works every time it’s tried.

Duck, NC – Are you looking for a smart solution to your partner’s snoring problem?

Have all your other feeble attempts to get a good night sleep failed?

Our very own Dr. Willy Nilly suggests using something that you probably already have in your home: Duct Tape!

Studies have shown that duct tape works 100% of the time for stopping snoring sleepers.

Directions: Simply cut a one foot section of heavy-duty duct tape and then carefully apply across the mouth area of your sleeping spousemate. During the holiday season, consider using decorative duct tape for a more festive mood.

FMO’s Dr. Willy Nilly Announces He’s Permanently Moving To Brazille

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Dr. Willy Nilly Moving 2 Brazilly

Rio de Janeiro, Braziliana – Our long-time friend and consultant, Dr. Willy Nilly, who’s been helping out the FM Observer for many moons, has finally decided to call it quits and move on into the next chapter of his postcocious life!

Dr. Willy Nilly’s Official Statement:

My time working with this crazy FM Observer funsite, which has almost been the best part of my life, so far, will sadly soon be coming to a end. The next phase of my life will be spent down in Brazille. Leaves have fallen all around, and it’s time I was on my way. Thanks to you, I’m much obliged for such a pleasant stay. But now it’s time for me to go. The winter moon lights my way. For now I smell the snow, it’s time to go, and I need to leave Fargo. Sometimes I grow so tired, but I know I’ve got one thing I got to do: Ramble On! And now’s the time, the time is now, to sing my song! I’m going around the world, I got to find my girl, on my way. I’ve been this way ten years to the day, Ramble On! Gotta find the Queen of all my dreams. Got no time for spreadin’ roots. The time has come to be gone. And to our health we drank a thousand times, it’s time to Ramble On! Ramble On! And now’s the time, the time is now, to sing my song. I’m goin’ down to Brazille, I got to find my girl. So, I’ll be on my way. Good bye, FM Observer!

Dr. Willy Nilly’s FMO Posts:

Ticks Are Bad For WE Fest

Basic Crash Course On Phlebitis