Recipes For Success

Russian Roulette Club (Once Again) Seeking One New Member
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Russian Roulette Club (Once Again) Seeking One New Member

March 30th, 2020 | by Johnnny
Moscow, Idaho – A Russian Roulette Club is actively seeking one new member to fill the vacant seat of a former member who suffered a mishap. “In any game of chance you have your ups and downs, and unfortunately for...
Kentucky Derby To Be Re-Raced For First Time In Its History
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Kentucky Derby To Be Re-Raced For First Time In Its History

May 6th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Louisville, KY – For the first time ever in its 145 year history, the Kentucky Derby will be re-run. This unprecedented re-running of the Race For The Roses is due to a very controversial finish which resulted in the second...
NFL Pickem Calculator Is Amazingly Accurate
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NFL Pickem Calculator Is Amazingly Accurate

November 19th, 2018 | by Johnnny
Pick City, ND – If you’re in an NFL pickem league and want a leg up on your fellow pickem pickers, the new Ronco Pickem Calculator is for you! Simply pick it up, turn it on, enter a few basic parameters about any...
Dr. Finance: Should I Buy Some Lottery Tickets For The Mega Jackpot?
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Dr. Finance: Should I Buy Some Lottery Tickets For The Mega Jackpot?

October 22nd, 2018 | by Johnnny
Jackpot, Nevada – Dear Dr. Finance: You’ve previously stated that gambling is a tax on the stupid. But would you say it’s OK to buy a lottery ticket when the jackpot gets up over a billion dollars? Thanks,...
Cat Racing Coming To Fargo
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Cat Racing Coming To Fargo

November 15th, 2017 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – The exciting sport of Cat Racing will soon be coming to Fargo! “Have some fun while betting on your favorite cat and get drunk at the same time. It just doesn’t get any better than that,” says...
Playing Slot Machines Good For Health
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Playing Slot Machines Good For Health

April 9th, 2017 | by Johnnny
Jackpot, Nevada – A new comprehensive study by casinos shows that there are numerous health benefits associated with playing slot machines. Essentially, the more time spent playing slot machines, the healthier (and...
Fargo Homeless Man Amasses Fortune From Penny Trays
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Fargo Homeless Man Amasses Fortune From Penny Trays

May 12th, 2016 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – A homeless man who has been calling Fargo home for the past few years shared his amazing story with the FM Observer recently. Jevon Varley once took a few pennies from the penny tray at a convenience store...
Vegas Casinos Ridding Roulette Of Number 23
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Vegas Casinos Ridding Roulette Of Number 23

April 4th, 2015 | by Johnnny
Las Vegas, NV – Most of the casinos in Las Vegas will soon be removing the number 23 from their Roulette wheels. Enough people have finally figured out that 23 is the luckiest Roulette number, which is now starting to cause...
FM Observer Donates Million Dollar Painting To Help Save Fargo’s Horse Park
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FM Observer Donates Million Dollar Painting To Help Save Fargo’s Horse Park

March 25th, 2015 | by Johnnny
West Fargo, ND – In a singular Herculean effort to raise money for the financially struggling North Dakota Horse Park which has been hounded by special assessment fees and unpaid property taxes, the FM Observer has decided...
Math Class Replaced By Black Jack Studies
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Math Class Replaced By Black Jack Studies

June 17th, 2013 | by Johnnny
Bismarck, ND – The North Dakota Education Association (NDEA) has decided to officially drop math from the state’s teaching curriculum. The teaching of boring, traditional math will be replaced by super-fun,...