Recipes For Success

Al Franken Dedicates New Center For Groping
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Al Franken Dedicates New Center For Groping

November 28th, 2017 | by Johnnny
St. Paul, MN – Yesterday Senator Al Franken proudly dedicated his new Center For Groping, which is conveniently located near the Minnesota State Fair grounds. At the dedication ceremony, when asked about all the recent...
Expensive Study Finds That Year 2100 Is Only About 82 Years Away
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Expensive Study Finds That Year 2100 Is Only About 82 Years Away

November 27th, 2017 | by Johnnny
St. Paul, MN – A recently completed study for the state of Minnesota has made an astonishing discovery about the year 2100. Minnesota scientists, working with NASA, have determined that the year 2100 in Earth Years is only...
Woman Claims Woodrow Wilson Touched Her Inappropriately During White House Visit
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Woman Claims Woodrow Wilson Touched Her Inappropriately During White House Visit

November 21st, 2017 | by Johnnny
Touchet, WA – A recently deceased woman claims that she was groped by then President Woodrow Wilson whilst she was on a group tour of the White House. Ms. Gerda Powis of Touchet, Washington wrote in her detailed memoirs...
Johnnny’s Sixth Retrospective (Posts 500-600)
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Johnnny’s Sixth Retrospective (Posts 500-600)

November 20th, 2017 | by Johnnny
Since 600 is such a nice round number, it was decided to use the occasion of my 600th post to take a trip back down memory lane. So, it’s time once again to look back on Johnnny’s last 100 posts on your FM Observer....
Cat Racing Coming To Fargo
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Cat Racing Coming To Fargo

November 15th, 2017 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – The exciting sport of Cat Racing will soon be coming to Fargo! “Have some fun while betting on your favorite cat and get drunk at the same time. It just doesn’t get any better than that,” says...
Vikings Place Sam Bradford On Injured Reserve And Activate Debra Getty-Widder
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Vikings Place Sam Bradford On Injured Reserve And Activate Debra Getty-Widder

November 10th, 2017 | by Johnnny
Viking, MN – The Minnesota Vikings’ quarterback controversy seems to finally be resolving itself in dramatic fashion. Whilst Sam Bradford is heading to the Injured Reserve list, the Minisoda Vikings have signed Debra...
It’s No Longer OK To Say OK
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It’s No Longer OK To Say OK

November 6th, 2017 | by Johnnny
Kinderhook, NY – Saying OK is no longer considered to be politically correct according to the PC Police. Because “OK” was made popular back when Martin Van Buren was running for president under the nickname Old...
Oprah’s Much-Anticipated Holiday Gift-Giving Guide
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Oprah’s Much-Anticipated Holiday Gift-Giving Guide

November 4th, 2017 | by Johnnny
It is once again that lusciously delightful time of year when everyone waits to see what’s on The Oprah’s gift giving idea list for the upcoming holidays. Every year The Oprah shares her wonderfully personal list of...
New Wonder Drug Called ‘Blitzkrieg’ Has Some Very Serious Side Effects
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New Wonder Drug Called ‘Blitzkrieg’ Has Some Very Serious Side Effects

November 3rd, 2017 | by Johnnny
The FDA has just approved a powerful new drug that has been tested to cure a number of major ailments in lab rats. Now approved for humans, Blitzkrieg has a number of potentially very bad side effects that you should be aware of....
Moorhead Couple Caught With 800 Pounds Of Qiameth Worth An Estimated $2.4 Billion
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Moorhead Couple Caught With 800 Pounds Of Qiameth Worth An Estimated $2.4 Billion

November 2nd, 2017 | by Johnnny
Moorhead, MN – Police in the quirky town of Moorhead were very surprised to find 800 pounds of Qiameth in the trunk of a car that they found parked at a stop sign. The Qiameth, which is known to be 1,000 times more powerful...