Police Dog Licks Man To Death
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Police Dog Licks Man To Death

April 2nd, 2019 | by Johnnny
Lickota, ND – A man was reportedly licked to death while attending a police Meet and Greet social event. The man, whose name is not being released until his family is notified, was identified as Mucciolo Knight from...
Loud Michael Bolton Music To Be Used At Southern Border To Dissuade Illegal Entries
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Loud Michael Bolton Music To Be Used At Southern Border To Dissuade Illegal Entries

March 31st, 2019 | by Johnnny
Rio Grande, TX – Border patrol enforcement officers will soon be using an effective new weapon in their fight against illegal immigration across the southern border of the United States. Very loud Michael Bolton songs have...
Today Is The Last Day Of The Beginning Of Your Life
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Today Is The Last Day Of The Beginning Of Your Life

March 27th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Here is your Inspirational Message for today from FM Observer’s very own online-ordained Pastor Peter Paul: Dear Friends: Today, as the sun sets on the horizon, this chapter of your life will be over. Everything up until...
Peter Pan Claims He Was Abused By Michael Jackson, Until Tinker Bell Found Out!
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Peter Pan Claims He Was Abused By Michael Jackson, Until Tinker Bell Found Out!

March 25th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Neverland, CA – The real Peter Pan is now alleging that the late Michael Jackson sexually abused him in Neverland. Michael Jackson is posthumously arguing that it...
Cathy’s Cat Cafe Opens In Fargo; Reviews Give It Five Meows
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Cathy’s Cat Cafe Opens In Fargo; Reviews Give It Five Meows

March 23rd, 2019 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – The new and hip trend of having restaurants specifically for our feline friends has finally come to Fargo! Cathy’s Cat Cafe will cater to cats by offering a full catalog of favorite cat foods and fun....
Charles Barkley Helps FMO Readers With March Madness
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Charles Barkley Helps FMO Readers With March Madness

March 20th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Basketball, USA – Your FM Observer has asked our friend Sir Charles Barkley to help our loyal readers with their March Madness bracketology. FMO: Sir Charles, how can you tell the difference between a winning team and a...
Proceeds From Famous Painting By Amsterdam Douglass To Help Fund Fargo’s Flood Fight
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Proceeds From Famous Painting By Amsterdam Douglass To Help Fund Fargo’s Flood Fight

March 18th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Fargo, ND – Fargo’s very own Amsterdam Douglass is donating his most famous recent painting for auction to help raise funds for Fargo’s focused fight for freedom from feared forecasted floods. The painting,...
FM Observers Celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day With A Surprise Trip To Ireland
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FM Observers Celebrate Saint Patrick’s Day With A Surprise Trip To Ireland

March 17th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Cork City, Ireland – Because many FM Observers have such strong ties to Ireland, we decided to take a trip and celebrate St. Patrick’s day with the Irish. While visiting with Corkonians here in Cork City, we’ve...
Democrats Considering Lowering Voting Age To Ten While Offering Them Free Candy
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Democrats Considering Lowering Voting Age To Ten While Offering Them Free Candy

March 15th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Washington, DC – Nervous Democrats needing a win in the next presidential election are pushing to lower the voting age to ten while offering children free candy and recreational marijuana. Speaker Nancy Pelosi believes...
Because Of Global Change, Geese Don’t Know Which Direction To Migrate
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Because Of Global Change, Geese Don’t Know Which Direction To Migrate

March 14th, 2019 | by Johnnny
Goose Village, Nebraska – Wildlife biologists are noticing confusion amongst the migrating goose population. Professional bird watchers are observing that migrating geese seem “very confused” as to which...